Walmart is one of the largest retail chains in the country and the world. From a pin to a pincushion, the store sells anything that money can buy. But that doesn’t interest us today. For, today we are going to focus on the myriad images that have come up of customers and products that you would see only at this store. These are The People of Walmart.
What Happens Only At Walmart, Stays At Walmart!
1. Blink and You Miss!
Where do we look? The buttcheeks clearly visible through the nude leggings, or the literal teenager sitting on the shopping cart? At the end of the day- we only have a couple of eyes.
2. Panic At Walmart!
Walmart sells musical instruments- if you aren’t aware. So, it shouldn’t be surprising that there will always be people playing instruments without a care about the world.
3. Camo gone wrong?
Camouflage originally had one use- protecting the soldiers from enemies. Who knows when it turned into people wearing it anywhere just to look cool?
4. An 18th Century Cart
If your cart has four legs, a place to sit, and gives you a judgmental stare, congratulations! You are the lucky customer to receive the ‘Chosen One’.
5. Kid Rock Wannabe
If you are a cowboy and don’t pair knee-high boots with yellow boxer shorts, are you really a cowboy? Shame!
6. Skid marks? Hopefully not!
There is no reason why one has to place a ‘Slippery’ sign over a skid mark. Absolutely no reason.
7. It’s Leg Day Everyday
If you can’t afford a gym membership, but want those calves to shine through, be a shopping manager and wear high heels. The daily rush will give you legs supermodels would be wary of.
8. Stupid Is As Stupid Does
You know you have met a friend or partner for life when they wear clothes as stupid as you do.
9. When The Fly Is Too Hot To Handle
You need to run, but the pedicure is #2cool4school. What to do? So many conundrums, so little time.
10. Uncle Sam At Walmart
This guy is so old he could be Uncle Sam’s father, for all we know.
11. Modern Technologies Herald Modern Problems
When women get glued to toilets, you know Walmart has attained full technological advancement.
12. Your Mother Is Your Greatest Supporter
If you are your mother’s child, she is quite possibly going to be at your beck and call even in prison. And when you win Prisoner of the Month, she is going to stick that behind her car. Quite wholesome in a weird way, if you ask me.
13. Only in Florida
If you see an alligator getting dragged by a leash at a Walmart, my friend, you are in Florida. The facsimile of Biblical paradise.
14. Not The Most Ideal Sticker
Confederate stickers are so 1860s. One should try a Democratic sticker next- variety is, after all, the spice of life.
15. Dressed For Walmart
Every single customer at Walmart wears the most bizarre clothes ever. It feels as if they are only going to use their brain to shop for things. Everything else can wait. Including proper clothes.
16. Hippie Justin Timberlake
Careful- this man brought sexy back and is hence a national treasure.
17. So Close, Yet So Far Away
Sometimes, participation trophies count. After all, they had the correct spirit. And what you lack in smartness can be made up for through effort.
18. Walter White Has A New Place To Stay
Heisenberg doesn’t want to stay in a trailer anymore. This time around, crystal meth will be sold from Walmarts. Easy access, if nothing else.
19. Raccoons Love It- Women Don’t
If your whip has raccoons all over it, congratulations! You have successfully contracted rabies and it is time to get your shots.
20. Hillbilly Einstein
If you are wondering about how to protect your belongings on your trick in Alabama, all you have to do is put up a latch.
21. Pokemon Go
When you dress your child up as Pikachu, dress your wife as Misty, and yourself as Ash, conversations might get weird when your child grows up a little.
22. Bad Boys, Bad Boys- What You Gonna Do, What You Gonna Do When They Come For You?
According to a social media user, “Woop-Woop! That’s the sound of da police Woop-Woop! That’s the sound of da beast Woop-Woop! That’s the sound of da police.” Ice-Cube would be proud!
23. Choices To Make, Roads To Take
What do you choose? Vodka, Jack Daniels, or the consequences of your foolish actions?
24. Bring Your Pet To Walmart Day
You must have seen an alligator doing the rounds of Walmart. Well, now it is time for the Goat to bless your eyes.
25. A Maxi-Pad
Is that a floating bed on water? Or is it a sanitary pad for Hagrid’s wife? We may never know.
26. Baby Stroller- Cat Lady
Some carry their babies when they shop, and this woman had the bright idea of carrying her cats while she shops. Who’s going to find them after they do run away, I wonder?
27. Do You Want Your Stab Wound To Be Medium, Rare, Or Well-Done?
When one knife can stab properly, why do you need so many? Overcompensating for something else, are you?
28. Yee-Haw Couple
Some couples ride off into the sunset on their horses. Some do so in their cars. But this couple decided a mall scooter was the best vehicle for their dream vacation. Well, you do you, folks.
29. Baking Your Cake And Having It Too!
You have to be really entitled to eat a cake at a mall and then pay half the price for it. Really entitled- or a Texan.
30. The Drip is Real
Clothes, no clothes, or hospital clothes- the Walmart craze is real. If I was in charge of advertisements, I would hire this guy to pose for an advert for the retail chain.
31. Marcel the Monkey
After finding fame on FRIENDS, Marcel lost his way into a couple of bad decisions- and now has to buy his dietary items from a Walmart. Sad days indeed.
32. Goats! Goats! Goats!
Walmart has a proclivity of people bringing their goats in. And this time around, the goat wears a diaper.
33. The MILF Mobile
From Stacy’s Mom to Stifler’s Mom, there’s nothing wrong with a good ole’ MILF mobile.
34. You Sleep Where You Can
Does Walmart have sofas so that people can sleep or are they actually trying to sell them? One of life’s greatest mysteries, I tell you.
35. Optical Illusion
WHAT IS THAT GIRL DOING IN A WALMART? Oh, never mind- looks like Walmart does play tricks with your head.
36. Mission Impossible- Walmart Edition
I will not accept any other answer apart from Tom Cruise and Henry Cavill having a full-out brawl in a Walmart washroom.
37. Inspired by Superman
Just like Superman wears his underwear over his pants, this human decided to emulate the strongest superhero this planet has ever seen. Hey- as far as influences go, it is not a bad influence at all.
38. Broomstick
Why does your kid think they would make a good mop? Questions that will definitely keep you up at night.
39. Discipline and Punish
You might not be able to physically slap your child when they are behaving like the obnoxious runts they are. But what stops you from handcuffing them to the shopping cart as you go about your business? Modern problems require modern solutions.
40. Dirty Grandpa
