A lady asked for advice on Reddit because she had a bad Thanksgiving at her mother-in-law’s house. When she got there, all the seats were taken, and she had to sit next to her husband’s ex-girlfriend, who is friends with her mother-in-law.
Getting along with your mother-in-law or daughter-in-law can be tricky, especially if things have been difficult.
But, a woman might have messed up her relationship with her mother-in-law during Thanksgiving when her husband’s ex girlfriend was there.
The Daughter-in-Law versus the Ex-girlfriend
A 28-year-old woman asked Reddit for advice about her Thanksgiving issue. She’s been married to her 33-year-old husband, Shaun, for five months, but they’ve been together for two years.
She, like many married women, doesn’t get along well with her mother-in-law, who tends to be passive-aggressive and critical.
To add to the problem, Shaun’s mother got along really well with his ex, Julissa, who still got invited to family events. Because Julissa had a good connection with Shaun’s family, they stayed friendly even after she and Shaun broke up.
The woman didn’t usually mind Julissa being at family events, but everything changed during Thanksgiving dinner.
Thanksgiving Dinner
“We celebrated Thanksgiving at my mother-in-law’s place. Shaun, my husband, went there ahead of me. When I got there, it was dinner time, and all the chairs were taken,” she explained.
When she arrived, her husband and everyone else were already sitting and ready to eat. Sadly, there were no empty chairs for her, and there was no room to add another chair.
When she asked why her mother-in-law didn’t save a seat, Shaun’s mom said sorry and mentioned that her granddaughter joined last minute. The woman didn’t like this and pointed to Julissa, upset she was sitting next to her husband.
She argued that, as the daughter-in-law, she had more right to be at the table than Shaun’s ex. Unfortunately, she realized too late that she shouldn’t have said that, and her mother-in-law insisted Julissa was just as much family as the Original Poster (OP).
She mentioned that her daughter-in-law was being impolite to believe differently. During the conversation, Julissa nodded and looked at the woman.
The upset woman shared, “I was so mad that I thought about leaving, but instead, I sat on my husband’s lap and tried to act normal. I asked him if he was okay with it.”
The Awkward Moments
As she sat on Shaun’s lap, the woman and her husband began eating and complimenting the dishes. But things got awkward when she praised her husband’s warm and comfy lap.
Even though her brother-in-law tried to chat and ease the tension, the uncomfortable situation couldn’t be ignored. Meanwhile, her mother-in-law and Julissa barely ate, exchanging glances and then looking at the woman.
After a while, Julissa went to the bathroom, and the woman’s mother-in-law went after her. The table stayed uncomfortable, but the woman and her husband kept eating.
When dinner was over, they went home. Later, the woman got a message from her mother-in-law, blaming her for being inappropriate and spoiling Thanksgiving.
The mother-in-law said the woman could have grabbed a chair from the kitchen instead of acting like a child and making Julissa uncomfortable.
Though some Reddit users supported the woman, a few criticized her husband for not doing anything during the situation.
“He should have given you his seat while he got another one. Actually, there should have been an empty seat next to him ready for you.”
Another Reddit user commented about the husband, “Why isn’t he handling his mom and stopping her from trying to set up his ex? Ultimately, this needs to be his responsibility, and he seemed very passive in all of this.”
Was it okay for the woman to sit on her husband’s lap? What would you have done in that situation?