Weddings aren’t always joyous for some parents. Our reader reached out and shared her story about her divorced parents who reconciled for their daughter’s sake on this special occasion. However, things turned unexpectedly when our reader’s mom couldn’t shake off some old grudges against her ex-husband.
One reader asked for our help.
While your mom’s comments about your dad were inappropriate, there might have been a better way to handle the situation. Consider extending an apology for kicking her out of your wedding, but also make sure she understands that you won’t accept her behavior.
Let her know that both you and your dad were hurt by her comments. Thank her for the gift, and kindly ask her to refrain from making comments about your dad. If she doesn’t have anything good to say, it might be best for her not to say anything at all.
Support your dad.
Let him know that you appreciate his thoughtful gift and that you don’t share your mother’s negative sentiments. Reassure him of his importance in your life, and let him feel valued and acknowledged. You can also consider spending quality time together, whether through shared hobbies, family outings, or even a guitar lesson from your dad. These moments can strengthen your bond.
Establish clear boundaries.
If future encounters between your parents are inevitable, articulate your expectations and boundaries. Communicate a zero-tolerance policy for negativity or disrespect, especially during family events. Remind them that, as adults, they can set aside their unresolved conflicts for a few hours and be open to talking it out some other time.
Family counseling could be a viable option.
Acknowledging lingering issues between your parents is crucial. It’s never too late to explore family counseling together. Attend sessions with them, as their tensions might flare up even before reaching the counselor’s office. Assure them of your equal love and desire for their happiness.
Parenthood is challenging and often comes with many expectations attached to it. In this article, we share the story of a woman who confesses that she hates being a mother but still loves her daughter in the utmost way, yet people start to question her sincerity.