Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old.
The first one said, “Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can’t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich”.
The second lady says, “Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can’t remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down”.
The third one says, “Well, ladies, I’m glad I don’t have any of those problems, knock on wood”.
As she hit her knuckles on the table she looked up and said,
“That must be the door… I’ll get it!”
A blonde buys two horses and can’t tell them apart.
So she asks the farmer next door what she should do.
He says to cut one of their tails off.
So she does.
But then the other horse’s tail gets caught in a bush and rips off.
So she can’t tell them apart again.
She asks the farmer for advice a second time.
He tells her to cut one of the horse’s ears.
So she does.
But then the other horse gets its ear ripped in a barbed wire fence.
She is still confused.
She asks the farmer what to do.
He tells her to measure them.
She comes back and says, “The white horse is 2 inches taller than the black horse!”
A blonde walks by a travel agency.
A blonde walks past a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, “Cruise Special – $99!”
She walks in, puts her money on the counter, and says, “I’d like the $99 cruise special, please.”
The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating.
A second blonde walks by a few minutes later sees the sign, walks in, puts her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special.
She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river.
Drifting into the stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde.
They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, “Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?”
The second blonde replies, ” They didn’t last year.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!