Just days before Christmas, Emma Heming Willis has shared a deeply personal reflection on how the holidays feel so different now as her husband, Bruce Willis, continues to live with frontotemporal dementia.
Bruce was first diagnosed back in 2022, and Emma has always been incredibly honest about the challenges their family faces. In a recent blog post, the 47-year-old opened up about the mix of emotions that come with this time of year, especially when traditions you once took for granted suddenly require so much more effort and planning.
She wrote about how the holidays can act like a mirror, showing you the past, the present, and what you thought things would always be like. For families dealing with dementia, that can hit especially hard. “Traditions that once felt somewhat effortless require planning—lots of planning,” she explained. “Moments that once brought uncomplicated joy may arrive tangled in a web of grief. I know this because I’m living it.”
But even in the sadness, Emma emphasized that there’s still room for warmth and connection. “Yet despite that, there can still be meaning. There can still be warmth. There can still be joy,” she added. “I’ve learned that the holidays don’t disappear when dementia enters your life. They change.”
One of the hardest parts for her is grieving the changes, even while Bruce is still here. She made it clear that it’s completely normal to feel that way. Grief isn’t just for loss through death—it’s for all the shifts, the missing pieces of old routines, and the roles that aren’t the same anymore.
Thinking back, Emma remembered how much Bruce used to love Christmas. He thrived on the excitement, the family gatherings, and all those little traditions. He was the one flipping pancakes in the morning, bundling up the kids for snow play, and just being that calm, reliable presence throughout the day. “Dementia doesn’t erase those memories,” she said. “But it does create space between then and now. And that space can ache.”
Earlier this year, in September, Emma talked about the difficult choice to move Bruce into a nearby single-story home with round-the-clock caregivers. It wasn’t easy, but it was what he needed for his safety and well-being.
These days, simple holiday tasks fall to her—like stringing up the lights or handling things Bruce used to take charge of. She admitted to sometimes muttering his name in frustration (in a lighthearted way), not out of anger, but because she misses how he used to own those moments. “He taught me well,” she said, “but I’m still allowed to feel annoyed that this is one more reminder of how things have changed.”
Her message to others going through similar struggles? Lean into the changes and focus on building new memories where you can. This year, their family will still exchange gifts and gather for breakfast. But now, Emma will be the one making Bruce’s famous pancakes.
It’s a reminder that life with dementia is full of adjustments, but love and togetherness don’t have to fade. Sending all our best wishes to Bruce, Emma, and their family this holiday season.