16 Women Whose Married Life Is a Never-Ending Drama

Family life is full of adventures, but the life of the heroines of this article seems to be something epic. After all, you never know what will happen when the husband tries to do his wife’s makeup, to dive deep into parenthood, or to figure out his significant other’s hints.

• I freaked out because my husband doesn’t help me with the kids. For the first time in my life, I left him with them alone and went for a bike ride. When I came back 2 hours later, the house was a mess, curtains were torn, cat was sitting on the lamp under the ceiling, dog was hiding under the sofa. And my children were chasing my husband around the house while he tried to get away from them. © Overheard / Ideer
• The Sunday started with the toilet tank breaking down. My husband decided to fix it. He shouted something to me from the bathroom, but I couldn’t hear it. Then he returned, pleased with himself because he had fixed it. I ran to brush my teeth, and my husband ran after me, yelling, “Spit it out!”
  Turned out he’d used my brush to clean the pipe because his brush was electric. This was what my husband was shouting to me from the bathroom, but I couldn’t hear him. He had to go buy me a new toothbrush, but I still couldn’t get rid of that “wonderful” feeling in my mouth. I love weekends. © Ward 6 / VK
• My husband is a perfectionist, and he always tries to find some flaws in me or in what I do. Recently, I decided to make an apple pie for the first time in my life. I did my best because I wanted to surprise my husband and cheer him up.
  He came home from work, sat down, and after a few bites started telling me in what things I had failed, “The top could be sweeter. The bottom is burnt. The apples aren’t caramelized.” I got tired of it and fired out, “You know, for the last 12 years, all you’ve done is criticizing everything I do or say!” And he replied, “Actually, we’ve been together for 11 years.” © Mamdarinka / VK

“Husband did my makeup and took the term ’eyeliner’ too literal.”

• I made a cherry pie for my husband’s parents. But as it turned out, my father-in-law is allergic to cherries. So I started berating my husband, “Didn’t you know your father is allergic to cherries? Why didn’t you tell me?”
  Turns out he did know and even saw what kind of filling I was making, but he just didn’t think about telling me. I was so offended, but my father-in-law said he didn’t eat sweets anyway. What a nice husband I have. © Caramel / VK
• My husband easily makes new friends. The other day we were traveling on a train. I got blisters from my sneakers, and my husband went to look for a band-aid. After 30 minutes, he returned with a band-aid and the news that he had found accommodation for us where we could live for a week free of charge. His new friends had an apartment that was empty, and they wanted us to stay there. I was shocked that people could trust someone with their place so easily after 30 minutes of chatting, but that’s what happened.
  We didn’t pay our new friends a penny, they refused to take money. So when we were leaving, we called a cleaning service, and gave the owners a jar of caviar and 10 pounds of fruit. I will never cease to be amazed at my husband’s communication skills and his ability to make friends. I’ve never been able to do that, and I don’t even know how. © Ward No. 6 / VK
• I’m sitting in the kitchen, drinking tea, eating biscuits, reading a book. My husband comes in, takes a stool and sits in front of the fridge. He opens it and says thoughtfully, “What should I make a salad out of?” 5 minutes later, my ’cook’ takes out eggs, fish, meat, mayonnaise and crab sticks. He mixes them all in a bowl and starts eating it with bread.
  I ask him, “Where are veggies and herbs in this ’salad’?” And he replies, “Well, Mary, I’m not a herbivore! I need meat!” © Mamdarinka / VK

“My brand new $72 moisturizer. Husband said he needed something for his elbows.”

• Husband is annoying. He constantly takes his food and walks with it all over the house. And he leaves the plate where he ends up eating: in the bedroom, hallway, living room, balcony, shelf, bedside table, even near the sink. And then he complains that I’m a bad homemaker because there are no clean dishes at home. Well, thanks to him there are no dishes at all because it’s a quest to find them. © Hidden Stories / VK
• My husband can’t understand why I always come back tired and angry after walking with our 2-year-old son. So, I sent him for a walk with the kid. And I gave him a clear action plan: park, playground, supermarket. And he was supposed to come back not earlier than in 2 hours. Exactly 2 hours later, they came back home: the happy son with an ice cream and the angry, red, and sweaty husband.
  Right from the doorstep, he shouted, “He ran to the road, I followed him, but he was so fast, I even spilled coffee on myself! I caught him and realized that we had left the stroller in the park. We returned to the park and then went to the playground. I bent down to tie my shoelace, and the little guy started eating sand! And the other kids started doing the same.
  Then he decided to fight with a pigeon. No, not to chase, but to fight! Then I had to change his diaper in the playground. I went to throw out the diaper, and the little guy got off the bench and ran to the swings. I barely got him dressed and put him in the stroller. He’s screaming, I’m tired, but then I remember that we still need to go to a supermarket.
  Here’s a bag of groceries. I’ve got you chocolates, juices, chips, and a cake. I don’t know how you do it! It’s harder than work! And now I’ll go take a bath, I need some rest.” After that walk, I’ve never heard another reproach from my husband! © Mamdarinka / VK
• My husband folds his dirty laundry and places it on the ottoman at the foot of the bed. Then he asks why I didn’t wash his dirty clothes. I’m sorry, I figured it was clean and that you didn’t put it away yet. Maybe put it in the hamper next time. © atomicrutabaga / Reddit

“How my husband eats donuts:”